Practice the Pause

June 17, 2020

How hard is it to keep cool under pressure? For me it has been a practice. I would be okay with strangers and not react, but with people close to me, well that was much harder. That knee jerk reaction would just get the better of me. I would say things I later would regret. It also started to become a pattern. Every time my older daughter would do or say something that I thought wasn’t right, I would open my big mouth and put my two cents in. This would go on and on until I finally became aware of what about the dynamics of our relationship I was playing a part of.  I admit, I do not like the way she chooses to live her life but she is an adult and I must learn to pause. It ain’t easy!

Practicing this has made all the difference in myself and my relationship with her. Not that she has changed her habits or life style, but I have created a space for being present without judgement or resentment. She really is my greatest teacher. Teaching me patience, acceptance, non-judgement, love, compassion, peace and happiness. Who is your greatest teacher? Do you have  someone close to you that presses all those painful buttons in you? Once I looked deeper into our relationship I saw unhealed parts in me that she was reflecting back. Love can be messy. It can be painful. It can be raw and vulnerable. Practicing the pause, allows for healing to take place. It allows you to surrender to the moment and just sit in whatever is bubbling up in you without reacting. However uncomfortable it may feel in the moment, stay with the pause and it will eventually begin to dissolve into peace, and that peace will radiate out into others.

Listen deeply. breath deeply, and love deeply. It is here where you will release all those old patterns of hurt and suffering. The world is hurting right now. People are hurting. I have learned to pause, to be mindful of what I am doing and how I am being that either contributes to the suffering or contributes to happiness and peace. What are you contributing to?  Here’s a cute little video to bring some joy into your day!


In To Me See

June 26, 2019

 

Intimacy is a word that people think of when it comes to sex and getting physically close with someone. However, intimacy has more to do with connecting on a level where you are able to trust, share, be open to exposing your feelings on a very deep level. It is about being vulnerable and feeling secure enough to communicate your truth. You even become intimate with yourself! To love yourself enough that your thoughts and feelings are okay, what ever they are.


If you weren’t able to express your feelings as a child, most likely you learned to hide them, avoid them, suppress them, dumb them and find other ways to not let people see your true self. You don’t even want to see your true self. If you’ve been hurt physically or mentally it changes who you think you are. You develop an armor shield to protect yourself.

But you will always have that insecurity and shame around you. It will follow you and keep you a prisoner in your own body. You might think you’re protected but you’re exposed. Who you really are speaks louder than your words. This is were help is so important. We can’t see our blind spots. You can get naked in bed but until you take off your armor you’re not connecting . Getting intimate is one of the most liberating feelings. So, isn’t it time you come out to play and in to me see?